It has been a month since i’ve written in this blog. This past month has been  a mixture of struggle and inspired and struggling again and being inspired again. It was good to speak to my mentor again because he helped me steer in the right direction. That’s why I am recommend other people to go get yourself a mentor. My mentor is just an awesome person. He allowed me to see where I wanted to go again. The thing is we all sort of know where we want to go. I can’t really say that with confidence yet, but many have had encounters with a pull or a tug in their hearts, to do something, to be something. I am motivated to go to medical school.

Being an undergraduate (a 1st-year) is fun, but also tough. Especially at this time and period. I guess, there’s a lot of tough situations in life. Its the part of your life where you need to make decisions, and from what i feel, you need to make these decisions really quickly because these opportunities come by so quickly that it’s tough to catch the next train, if you know what i mean. I really wanted to meet my mentor again because it’s been a long time since we’ve sat down and talk, but it was good to really get things off out of my chest.

These past few weeks/month, I’ve had a huge dedication to my academics, my studies and I’ve neglected a huge portion of my life, the social aspect of course. I “disciplined” myself to staying one class ahead, knowing that midterms will be coming up and then next thing you know, it will be the finals. Its having the ability to manage your time. I’ve always encouraged having a sense of balance but I mean, life is so full of entropy, there’s just a lot of randomness and chaos, that at times, these balance do go out of whack. Life is amazing like that, one moment everything could be so right and so peaceful and you’re just so motivated to take on the world and SHABAM! all of a sudden, something is sort of weighing you down. There’s a hidden pressure that is instilled in our minds and sometimes we need to get that load off. I told him about that and I told him about my passion. Something that I want to do outside of the classroom, outside of the studying and the exams. I had this moment of “re-inspiration” again. I want to set up a TEDxconference in my university. I was watching some of the TED talks and there was so many of the speakers that were so passionate, and their flame allowed my flame to be lit much bigger again.

It reminded me of a quote that I personally keep in my mind by Marianne Williamson,

“Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate, our greatest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

I just wanted others to be re-inspired again and possibly there are others that feel the same way as I do, who once were passionate about their life and they just need someone or something to catalyze that passion once again. Setting up a Tedx would mean a lot of planning and there’s just a lot involved in it, but I think it would be worth it. I just recently got news that this year’s TEDx in my university got cancelled, so hopefully I would be able to be a part of the crew for next years (possibly). I remember reading another quote somewhere from Thurman which said,

“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive.  And then go and do that.  Because what the world needs is people who have come alive”

Its that constant question that you have to ask yourself, “What makes you come alive? What are your passionate about? What can you continually do without any rewards or monetary gains? What stirs up your heart?”

The talk also reminded of another passion of mine, music, medicine and health. I thought of an idea to set up a club in my university that allows people to play their music (whether it be guitar, piano, vocal, saxophone, etc) in hospitals for music therapy programs, because a happy heart is a good heart. There has been plenty of research that supports the idea that music can allow healing to occur faster, due to mind being more relaxed and more calm, allowing the body to focus its energy on the process of healing. In order for this club to occur I would have to contact the hospitals in this area and ask permission for this to occur. I would also have to gather a group of people to be involved in this club as well and I would need to write a constitution and there’s many things that need to be done.

I am also planning to talk to a researcher who’s works is in music and neuroscience, my 2 huge interests, so that will be interesting, but right now, my mentor is helping me out in the writing an e-mail portion, and being able to shape my passion and my interest in writing. I still need to get that down pat. I need to work on my writing a lot. I’ve been reading 2 books lately, Bridges of Wave (an interesting book about listening to music and taking the full experience and appreciation of it) and also Wild at Heart (an awesome book about the journey of man’s heart and the passion and desire). It has been quite a reading week, but I have to start buckling up in this midterm rollercoaster. I’m attending a talk about Summer Jobs and going my dodgeball intermural game later on.

University life is just amazing. Even though there are some days that you study and work your butt off in isolation, its nice to be able to  have awesome mature talks about life and our plans for it, and about the health care system and just about the different things that we would like to see change in the world. It’s cool to hear other people’s perspective things on it.

With that, I bid thee farewell.

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